Grief is universal – and something that is very hard to avoid.
So why can it be so difficult to talk about something that affects everybody to some extent at some point in their lives?
For artists, Emily Simpson and Chris Alton, grief was something they experienced at a relatively young age. They both lost one of their parents suddenly when they were in their 20s.
Emily said: “We started exploring language because we noticed that there is such a lack of it to explain the experience of grief. There’s just not a general vocabulary, and often a lack of permission to actually talk about grief.
“If you have enough language to talk about that experience, it won’t make it better, but it will maybe cushion that experience. It’s nice to be seen.”
Emily referred back to her experience following the death of her dad, when she felt she lost a little of her identity, through the absence of a term for losing a parent.
“My dad died, but I’m not an orphan, because my mum’s still alive… We have the word widow, but we don’t really have any other words for any of the other grieving identities.”
This experience was the inspiration behind the exhibition, titled “Grief Must Be Love With Nowhere To Go”, which is currently on its third showcase – this time at Warrington Museum and Art Gallery.
Standing in the room, there’s a comforting feeling from the second you walk in, like you are walking into a space that feels welcoming and safe.
The exhibition is visually pleasing, with the focal point being a large textile display attached to the roof, creating what Emily and Chris describe as a “shelter”. It is covered with phrases relating to lived experiences of grief.
The ‘shelter’ is the perfect embodiment of what the exhibition is for so many – a place of comfort, where people at different stages of grief can come together to be open about their own experiences.
The travelling exhibition has become somewhat of a base for Emily and Chris to offer different opportunities for people to open up.
As part of their wider project, the pair have hosted a range of events, such as community dinners and sewing events to help bring people together.
To mark the end of each exhibition, the space opens up for a unique way of channelling grief – karaoke.
Emily said: “We invite people to come and perform a song that reminds them of someone or something that they have lost… that could be bereavement in the sense of a person, or a loss of identity, autonomy, or an expected future. It’s open to interpretation.”
An interesting observation from the event was the sheer diversity in the people who attended and performed. Different generations, all grieving different people and things, came together in a supportive environment to share a part of themselves.
The songs performed varied from emotional, to light-hearted, each attached with their own meaning to the performer.
The final song, Frank Sinatra’s “My Way”, was performed as a collective, something Chris and Emily do as a tradition at the end of each karaoke session to bring the event to a close.
The pair reflected on this choice when they introduced the final song, describing it as “the most popular funeral song, and also the most popular karaoke song.”
The event proved to be a cathartic experience for its attendees, shown by the smiles on their faces as they left.
A community was created here, just through an hour of singing and sharing stories of grief.
